Podcast #89 Another Joke

Published in the category General Practice, Humor, Lesson Exercises PDF

Lesson Exercises

A farmer named Clyde had a car accident. He had been hit by a truck. Several weeks later, he was in court. He was suing for medical expenses.The lawyer for the trucking company was questioning him.

The lawyer said, “At the scene of the accident, didn’t you say ‘I’m fine’?”

Clyde responded, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule, Bessie…”

The lawyer interrupted. “I didn’t ask for any details. Just answer the question. Did you not say ‘I’m fine’?”

Clyde said, “I had just loaded my favorite mule, Bessie. I was driving down the road…”

The lawyer interrupted again. He said, “Judge, I am trying to establish one fact. This man spoke to the highway patrolman who came. He said that he was just fine. It is now several weeks after the accident. He is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.”

However, the judge was interested in Clyde’s answer. He said, “I’d like to hear what he has to say.”

Clyde thanked the judge and proceeded. “Well, I had just loaded Bessie into the trailer. I was driving her down the road. Suddenly a huge semi ran a stop sign. It smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into the ditch on the left. Bessie was thrown into the other ditch.

“I was hurting real bad. I could hardly move. I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape. A highway patrolman came on the scene. He heard Bessie and went over to her. He saw she was in a lot of pain. He took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

“Then the patrolman came across the road. He still had his gun in his hand. He looked at me and said, ‘Are you in a lot of pain?’

“Now, Judge, what the hell would you answer?”

 

A farmer named Clyde had a car accident.

A farmer named Clyde got into a car accident.

 

He had been hit by a truck.

A truck had hit him.

 

Several weeks later, he was in court.

He was in court a few weeks later.

 

He was suing for medical expenses.

He was suing for his medical bills.

 

The lawyer for the trucking company was questioning him.

The trucking company’s lawyer was questioning him.

 

At the scene of the accident, didn’t you say ‘I’m fine’?
Didn’t you say you were fine at the accident scene?

 

Well, I’ll tell you what happened.

Well, here’s what happened.

 

I had just loaded my favorite mule, Bessie…

I had just got my mule into the trailer….

 

I didn’t ask for any details.

I didn’t request any details.

 

Just answer the question.

Just respond to the question.

 

Did you not say “I’m fine”?

Weren’t your exact words “I’m fine”?

 

I was driving down the road…

I was driving along the road…
The lawyer interrupted again.

Once again the lawyer interrupted.

 

Judge, I am trying to establish one fact.

Judge, I want to get one fact on the record.

 

This man spoke to the highway patrolman who came.

This man talked with the patrolman who arrived.

 

He said that he was just fine.

He said he was perfectly fine.

 

It is now several weeks after the accident.

The accident is now several weeks in the past.

 

He is trying to sue my client.

He is attempting to sue my client.

 

I believe he is a fraud.

I believe he is acting fraudulently.

 

Please tell him to simply answer the question.

Please instruct him to just answer my question.

 

I’d like to hear what he has to say.

I would like to find out what he has to say.

 

Clyde thanked the judge and proceeded.

Clyde thanked the judge and went on.

 

Well, I had just loaded Bessie into the trailer

Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer.

 

I was driving her down the road.

I was transporting her along the road.

 

Suddenly a huge semi ran a stop sign.

All of a sudden this gigantic semi ran a stop sign.

 

It smacked my truck right in the side.

It smashed into the side of my truck.

 

I was thrown into the ditch on the left.

I got thrown into the ditch on the left.

 

Bessie was thrown into the other ditch.

Bessie got flung into the other ditch.

 

I was hurting real bad.

I was in a lot of pain.

 

I could hardly move.

I could hardly move at all.

 

I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning.

I could hear Bessie’s moans and groans.

 

I knew she was in terrible shape.

I knew she was in a bad way.

 

A highway patrolman came on the scene.

A highway patrolman arrived at the scene.

 

He heard Bessie and went over to her.

He heard Bessie and walked over to her.

 

He saw she was in a lot of pain.

He could see she was suffering terribly.

 

He took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

He took his gun out and shot her in the forehead.
Then the patrolman came across the road.

The patrolman then crossed over the road.

 

He still had his gun in his hand.

The gun was still in his hand.

 

He looked at me and said, “Are you in a lot of pain?”

He looked down at me and said, “Are you suffering a lot of pain?”
Now, Judge, what the hell would you answer?

Now, Judge, what in the hell would you have answered?

 

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